As a young woman I was anti lots of things, anti-war, anti-apartheid, anti-authority etc.  Everthing was black and white, love conquered all and peace was the only way forward.  Then life stepped in and everything changed to grey, there were still things i didn’t feel you could compromise on such as the apartheid issue but when i was forced to look at the alternatives to dealing with events like the holocaust i had to admit that standing by and protesting peacefully would not have stopped the Fuhrer.  Coming from a Catholic Irish family my decision to join the Army Medical Services Volunteers caused a wave of disapproval amongst the outer reaches but my immediate family knew that i must have thought about the ethics of it before deciding.  I believed that as a health care professional i could help those who were injured in the pursuit of their duty.  I don’t always agree with the powers that be and their decisions but then neither do a lot of the soldiers, but in many places they bring stability and freedom to people.  Over the years i have read more and studied the conflicts and have been appalled at the inordinate waste of young lives at times but have also marvelled at the courage and tenacity of many of our soldiers.  On a visit to Monte Cassino, Anzio and Syracuse we walked among row upon row of those who had died and now lay far from home.  The graves commission do the most wonderful job of maintaining these places and you will always meet someone who has travelled far and wide to visit someone they lost. 

Cemetry at Cassino

 

Anzio

 

Syracuse

When i was growing up i couldn’t wait to vote, i appreciated what the sufferagettes had fought for and wanted to continue to raise the awareness of  womens rights.  However it is so difficult to follow through on this when you are presented with little choice and don’t agree with a lot of their policies.  At the moment in the UK it is hard to have any respect for politicians as wave after wave of disclosures show that they have been cheating the public of tens of thousands of pounds on spurious claims.  Greed and lack of integrity are the order of the day so where do you place your X.  In N Ireland it is even worse with all the different Unionist Parties (UPs)- the DUP,UUP,PUP etc etc, and the other side with their extremist ideas as well.  Don’t get me wrong they have some good policies but it’s all wrapped up in bigotry and tribalism and i don’t trust any of them.     But not to use your vote is wrong too so i have to pick the least offensive and hope for the best.

It is May which in N Ireland terms means it is creeping closer to July and the “Marching Season”.  Where i live the band has started to practice, they use the community hall to hone their tunes and the streets to hone their marching.  Along side these musicians come the men with their tin cans collecting money for the band and so begins my yearly dilemma, do i refuse politely and risk being targeted, or do i relinquish my principles and throw a few coins their way.  So far a mumbled, sorry no change , seems to have seen me through until August when things begin to quiet down again so here we go again.

I enjoy words, reading them, speaking them and listening to others using them.  I have no problem with accents and colloquialisms but i dislike bad spelling and grammar.  Am I old fashioned or too stuffy?  I can’t help it, i find myself cringing especially if it is someone i think should be able to write with more attention to detail.  Take this morning, my “sort of ” boss is writing a reference for me and he sent it to me for a quick look, it is full of spelling mistakes, poor grammar and complete sentences that make no sense.  And as for his punctuation!!  So how do i gently correct it without seeming to criticise his efforts or do i just plunge right in with the red pen. I’m not perfect by any stretch of the imagination but i try to read back over my draft to at least check if it is understandable, is that so strange?

What a glorious day it has been.  I have weeded, hoed, planted and then sat back and enjoyed.  If only there were more days like this.  Many years ago on days like this i would have got on my motorcycle and headed down the twisty windy roads that hug the lough shore, stopping at the tip of the penninsula to watch the ferry cross to the other side a mere 7 mins away, have a 99 slider (ice cream wafer with a flake in it)  and then take the other road back home.  Someday i’ll buy another bike, just for days like these.    I’m starting to go over the Italian phrases i might need when i get to tuscany, i have a cd which is pretty good and allows me to speak and have my pronunciation checked so i hopefully will be understood. My sister celebrates her 25th wedding anniversary next week and i just couldn’t decide on a present.  They are both private people and really don’t want a fuss made but i couldn;t let it pass so i have bought them a silver birch tree.  They have a fabulous garden which they both work hard to maintain so i hope they will enjoy the tree.

Had an awful few days with a very heavy summer cold but am bouncing back.  Just waiting for my friend Jen to visit, it will be pizza and wine and gossip.  Can anyone of my transatlantic readers tell me why bangs are called bangs, here we call it a fringe and i can see why it might be called that as a fringe kind of hangs down as a cover but bangs?.  So if you can help me out i’d be grateful.

Today the weather gave me a little hope of a summer, i managed to get out into the garden and plant some new shrubs and flowers after clearing all the weeds.  Ireland is lush and green but it comes at a price – RAIN and lots of it.  But when i had finished and sat down to survey my work, the tree with it’s gorgeous pinky white blooms and the clematis just about to burst into full flower and all the other little plants with their kaleidoscope of colours, i was content to be here.  It may not be big and impressive, the area might not be exclusive but it’s my haven.

I’ve just read a fascinating post from 20th century woman on subsistence living, a concept that i was not totally familiar with.  I have now researched it on a very superficial level and realise that my sister has begun this in a small way as all her vegetables are home grown and she has made her own wine from fruits in her garden.  My partner would be deemed a bit of a survivalist as he has deliberately over the years learnt many skills in order to be as self sufficient as possible in the event of a disaster.  He is an Army medic, but can turn his hand to most household requirements, from plumbing to carpentry to electrical work. He learnt how to drive, fly, ski, ride a horse, just in case!!  I’d never thought about it before but if the worst were to happen i would trust him to help us survive, his ability to solve problems other people have given up on makes him a great leader and teacher. His motto is improvise. adapt and overcome.

In a similar vein I watched an amazing programme on the Nenet tribe of Northern Siberia as they moved their reindeer herds in the autumn migration.  The entire migration covers around 1100 kilometres and includes a 48 km crossing of the frozen waters of the Ob River. For these journeys the reindeer are used to pull sledges that carry the people and their camp.  The chum is the living space and is made of reindeer skins that are laid over a skeleton of long wooden poles, many of which have a special position in the structure and are not interchangeable., these chums are moved every other day during the migration.  The children attend boarding schools and only return during the summer holidays.  Watching their daily life in such harsh conditions i was totally amzed when they arrived at Yar-Sale, which is the administrative centre and where they sell their reindeer, to see that they had a large house there with all mod cons, stove, heating and TV.  Then when the sale was completed they packed up and went back to their herding, I’m such a woosy, I would have said ok off you go but i’ll just stay here.  They spoke about the freedom of the tundra and not liking to be confined, i just saw freezing tents and very hard work, i’m way too used to my home comforts.

It’s always the way isn’t it- you aren’t really looking forward to something and you drag your bones out because you have to or you don’t want to let others down and then it turns out better than you thought.  Well that was tonight , we had a great time, there was bowling and music quizzes and food and wine and i won a box of scrummy swiss chocolates.  Now i’m all wide awake and need to be asleep so i’m off to my very comfy bed.  Goodnight all.

I’m going bowling this evening, it’s a charity event and it should be fun but i’m having one of those days when everything is too much of an effort.  I know some of the reasons, my son who came back to live with me 4/5 years ago is hoping to move out.  I’m not a clingy mother and i don’t want him tied to me but he is the one i worry about.  He has an ongoing degenerative spinal condition which stopped him working for ages,  he is now working  but it pays minimum wage and I worry about how he’ll cope.  I worry that he drinks too much, that his spine is becoming more flexed and that he is 37 and has no one in his life.  His friends are sad guys who don’t do much, some have mental problems, some drinking problems and i suppose i worry that if he’s not living with me he might give up like they have.  He is such a lovely guy (all bias aside) and he deserves a much better life than this. Another reason is i went shopping this morning and tried on some new summer clothes, mistake, where did that mountain of flesh appear from, oh wait, it was always there but winter clothes are more forgiving.  Lastly, I ran out of meds two weeks ago and thought i’d try to do without, maybe not just yet.